Evolution Not Resolution

Every year I make a conscious effort to improve myself. I feel as human beings capable of thought and reason, we should never be static. The world around us is ever changing, what excuse have we to remain the same.

How many New Year's resolutions have you made in years past? How many did you actually honor? Don't worry, it's our secret. Here's one I think you can keep. Make a resolution to never make another resolution. They're all the same anyway. Lose weight, eat right, work out, be nice (maybe that one's just me). You vow to stop smoking, take up a hobby, go to church more and you do it all with the best intentions. Because isn't that how we all want to start off our new year, with good intentions? I say to the ruins with that, love. Don't resolve, evolve. Why not just decide to make one thing about yourself, your life, your situation better than the year before. For me that has meant many things over the years. It's included everything from getting promoted to growing as a parent. I love looking back over my life and being able to see growth and change from one year to the next. The key to my evolution is that I set one goal that requires many steps. That way I stay focused on what I've set out to do. Each step is an accomplishment in and of itself. Small victories have the power to keep you buoyed and propel you forward. This year I've decided to include a new philosophy in my evolution, it's one of my favorites. If you want what you've never had, do what you've never done. So simple yet so scary. There's a reason why you've never done it before, it's terrifying to do something new. If you're OCD like me, it's near impossible to do what you've never done because there's comfort in what you always do. You want more but there's comfort in what you have. This year let the first weight you lose be comfort. Shed it like a wool coat in August. The coat I'm shedding this year is made of fear, mistrust, and a complaining spirit. Thank God for a renewed spirit, which I feel is essential to this year's goal. Last year was self-esteem and courage. I learned to ask for what I want and that when I felt less than, I had to keep myself encouraged. This year I'm taking what I want, speaking my heart, and learning not to constantly side eye people. Admittedly I used to be more open to new people. Taking numerous arrows to the heart, be it from friend, family, or partners, will cause even the most loving person to shut down. This year I hope to marry my giving side with my suspicious side and see what they produce. Since I've never done it before I expect something fabulous in return. I'm speaking my heart, come what may. I recently lost my cousin to a hateful, horrible monster. To add to my pain, I never actually said to her, I love you, Jackie. I have no doubt in my mind she knew, but still she should have heard me say it. Now she never will. On the flip side, I've not spoken up enough to say I love you or I'm loving you no more. I've not said what you're doing is hurting me and you need to stop. I don't like being hurt so naturally I don't like to hurt other people. This year is the year of new paths. So sorry in advance to those whose feelings will be hurt. In this war for my happiness and well-being, there's bound to be some collateral damage. Not people but feelings and sadly, relationships. It's time to live, love, and be happy (Paula Abdul). Don't encumber yourself any longer with anything contradictory to that.